What the Frack-tion?

Today at work there were far too many numbers for my brain to compute.

If a company sends out 5,000 direct-mail coupons and 1,300 people respond, making the redemption rate 26 percent, and a list of 3,400 clients is collected, and ultimately the response rate, through viral marketing, grows to 15,000 people,
how long does it take until Michelle's brain explodes?

Someone do the math on that and get back to me.

I had to have the CEO of a company explain these numbers to me about four different times until I understood what was going on. I felt like I was in kindergarten. At least he didn't talk to me like a child, I guess.

Not to mention I also had to try to figure out the percent margin on what one hotel makes on their markup of Macallan 12-year scotch. I need about three, $12 1.5 oz shots of the $42 bottle after trying to calculate their margin. SPOILER: I fail to calculate the correct number.

Speaking of Macallan, I know how much many different bars across the United States charge for a shot, so if you're into countrywide consumption of scotch, you know who to call, my friends.

I can also give you the names of some premier mixologists in the Vegas and Denver areas, as well as let you know which bar some of the details of the JPMorgan Chase buyout of WaMu occurred.

And did I mention I AM READY FOR A VACATION? NOW.